Friday, December 31, 2010

The 3 Hour New Year Eve Blog - 2010 Tribute, 10 of 10!

Rest assured, it only takes like 15 minutes to READ...

It's 911 pm on the last day of 2010. Home for the Holidays has been our policy this season and in line with that, we decided we were going to stay home this New Year's eve too. We just ate a wonderful home cooked dinner and are watching some TV (the Holiday Edition of the game show Minute to Win It on NBC!) and I was beginning to wonder what was the right way to ring in the New Year.

On another day, we would have watched a film and ended it that way, but my son is keen on watching this show (it's actually good, I have to say!) and my wife has declared it's going to be NBC all the way tonight as she wants to watch live coverage from Times Square starting 10 PM which will go on until the ball drops at midnight.

With not even a millimeter of the 32 inch Samsung left for myself, I had to decide what to do. The choice was instant and obvious. The only thing that is going to keep me alive at this time (when I'm suffering from a headache) is writing. And given that I've really gone the whole nine yeards (or should I say eleven) with this 11 days to 2011 blogging spree, I decided that I would close this year with the final piece of this tribute.

If I'm writing this for the next 3 hours, it means you're likely reading this in the New Year, so first of all LET ME WISH YOU AND YOUR FAMILY A HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011.

The Holiday season really begins with Thanksgiving and then comes Christmas and ends with the New Year. So I'm going to start this piece by talking about all the great things in 2010 I'm grateful for.

Let me do this right. First things first, let me thank my wife for all the NEW TREATS she made me to eat in 2010. Thank you Kannamma, for the Biriyani, Bhel Puri, Bruschetta, the Chocolate Cake (on my birthday), Chocolate Chip Cookies, Tomato+Onion+Chilli+Panneer Dosa, Kalakand and I'm sure there's plenty more that I can't remember at this moment when I am stuffed with a pile of her special New Year's eve Adai Aviyal. And I hear there is some special lemon rice coming up tomorrow morning. Thank you Pondatti.

Next I have to thank my son, MY FAVORITE PERSON IN THE WHOLE WORLD! For being a nine year old, he brings a lot to the table (like food, crayons, socks, hat, karate weapons to name only a few). Seriously, he is AWESOME. He made my chest swell with pride this year by creating his own website (www.tejaskaushik.com), becoming a serious cricket fan (thank you IPL 2010), formally accepting Sachin Tendulkar as God, wearing a batsman's costume to his school Halloween party, readily accepting not to have a lavish Birthday party, creating all those mind blowing LEGO models that adorn our fireplace and finally by starting his own blog. In fact, he started writing his own pieces when I started this one today and is now on his 3rd piece (http://tejaslkaushik.blogspot.com). 2010 was the year I first heard my wife complain why she wished for a son like me!!!

Now on to other but not insignificant things. God knows how tough it is to build a credit history in the USA as an immigrant. It's also a crazy conundrum. You can't get credit without a history and you can't make a history if you don't have credit. Excuse me!@#$%^&? 2010 was the year when both the credit and the history magically happened for me and I'm thankful for that.

Everyone knows I completed a 15 year MBA dream this year and that too from Columbia Business School. But what was really special in 2010 was that in the 2 semesters I had in this year, I scored Honors (highest grade) in 6 of the 8 classes I took and made it to the Dean's list based on my GPA in both semesters. I have to thank all the wonderful professors and my fabulous classmates who made this possible for me. I am especially proud of my performance in the Systematic Creativity in Business class which was the very final exam of my course and let me walk out of school with my head held high.

2010 was the year I got Windows 7 on my computer, an SD card for my Blackberry (on which I now hold 273 of my favorite songs and am able to click endless photos), a GPS for my car and an IP phone for my home office. For a man who whose first article as the Editor of a company newsletter in 1998 was about why he hated technology and computers, so many gadgets in the same year was one too many. I am thankful I figured out how to use all of them well and glad that I am actually fond of them now.

I went places in 2010. I have already talked about my Silver Elite status on Continental but more than that, I am thankful for the places I went with family and friends for fun and frolic. Albany, Boston, Buffalo, Hartford, Long Beach Island, Jamestowne & Williamsburg and memorable visits to New York city and India. I also savored a lone trip to the Canadian capital of Ottawa. Though I only went there alone to get my VISA renewed and ended up working from the hotel most of the time, I enjoyed the 8 hour car drive up North and across the border.

A quick timecheck shows me I am at the halfway mark, it's 1032 PM. I'm thankful I have to only shift my gaze to the bottom right hand corner of my computer versus having to crank my neck and look up left at the clock to know the time is so. And I'm truly thankful to my wife who turned the TV off a little while ago so she could read her Bible (the Sai Satcharitra). It is so peaceful at home and my headache has started clearing up.

Maybe the right time for me to move on from my thank you mode to other things, but not before I thank life for the one thing I enjoyed this year more than anything else. SPRING. I am certainly a Sun & Warm person than the Snow & Cold types. What else can one expect from someone who played 8 hours of cricket on a day that had the mercury at 42 degrees celsius in the tropical town of Chennai in South India?

That said the months of April, May and June this year were absolutely wonderful. The sun shined all the while and I was smiling every minute. I was working long hours and working very hard but still, I always spent quality time with my family and friends. I was on the phone every waking minute of the day, but every single conversation added cheer to my life. My energy was limitless and my confidence was boundless. I felt a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment like never before. I don't know what it was, but I have heard my wife say, "I've never seen you happier than this in the last 12 years I've known you". May be it was the fact that my company had agreed to extend my stay in the US (as of March), may be it was the expectation that I was about to graduate in Summer or may be it was the people I was with in the places I was, but if I God ever gave me the chance to have something back from my life, I would ask for those 3 months again. Thank you God, once again...

11 PM sharp, now down to the very last hour of this wonderful year that has been 2010. I am so THANKFUL TO LIFE for what I am doing this very moment. I could be a million places right now, singing, dancing, playing or simply enjoying. Or so I would believe. Nothing has given me more pleasure than "Writing" in this year and I am especially proud of what I have done in the last 11 days. I truly think I've found something that will be my own for the rest of my life, that will never leave me, never judge me, never ask anything from me but always be there for me whenever I choose it. Truly, THERE'S NO PLACE I'D RATHER BE...

The trouble with writing a 3 hour blog is that at some point, you don't know how it started and where you are. Honestly, I don't know where I want to go either!!! So I just took a few minutes and read this from top to bottom. And I also wanted to make sure this 3 hour marathon does not become unreadable ardor. Which is why I went back to line 1 and inserted the time it would perhaps take you to read this. And it's also how I brought the clock to 1130, just 30 minutes from touchdown!!!

I'm not running out of ideas. I could go on and on about 2010 but that would take me several years to write and still only a few days to read. But I think I have said what I wanted to say. I have also done everything I should have done in 2010. So let me take the next few minutes and talk about the year that's about to begin.

I'm not making any resolutions. THAT'S SO LAST YEAR (it's also one of the best things I heard my son say this year, by the way). But there certainly are a few things I want to see happen in 2011. I want to say less and LISTEN more for starts. I want to say it like it is and never say 2 words where there is a need for only one.

I want to work harder in my one job and not need an MBA or another vocation to keep me motivated. I want to pick up at least one new skill in this new year, be it photography or playing the piano or plain simple cooking. I want to travel the world, to Canada & Mexico, Bulgaria & London, India & the Philippines, Columbia and Egypt and every other location that my wonderful company will put its footprint on.

I want to talk to my Grandma every week of this year, no matter what's going on in my life. I want to spend more time with my son and learn from him the amazing things he knows at 9. I want to do whatever I have to do for people around me but I want to do that one thing that I feel I want to do from the bottom of my gut. I don't want to sound rhetorical, but I want to write a lot more than I ever wrote before. I want to make sure I hurt no one wilfully. I want to make this year, not about myself, but about YOU.

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011 TO ONE AND ALL (and thank you for your patience reading this...)

My Love Affair with NJTP - 2010 Tribute, Part 9

I started this year on the Turnpike, after braving the weather to go see the ball drop at Times Square. I was back with HER (I am a HE, you see!) on New Year's Day, have probably been with HER more times this year than any of the last 3 that I have been in the US and every single time has been MAGIC, one way or the other.

I love HER from start to finish. So I guess the best way to do this is to go exit by exit and see why I love the New Jersey Turnpike more than any other road in the USA.

I've never seen Exit 1 (or maybe I have), but life starts for me at Exit 2, in Swedesboro, NJ. What a wonderful coincidence for a TamBram (Tamil Brahmin) becuase right off of Exit 2, on the Swedesboro Paulsboro road is the Raja Ganapathi Temple, by far the closest from our home that has has appealed to my mind. So to say, exit 2 is kind of the Pullaiyar Suzhi.

I love HER at Exit 3 that leads directly to Philadelphia and Atlantic City and will be the course taken by many revellers tonight for New Year's eve celebrations. My home is located between Exits 4 and 5 so I'd be foolish if I don't love HER there. I take one exit or the other depending on which way I am going, 4 when going south and 5 when going north, though taking 4 going north has not been uncommon becuase that is the exit that is technically in Mt Laurel, which is the town I live in.

I love her at Exit 6 where she comes together with the Pensylvania Turnpike and it is only 2 miles from Exit 7, so it is always a landmark for me, especially when I am returning home after a long day. When I hit Exit 7, I know I am only 2 minutes away from Exit 6 and then only one exit to go for Exit 5, which then takes me home in less than 10 minutes. Not that I am happy to leave HER and go home, but a man's got to do what he's got to do...

I love HER at Exit 7A, becuase that is my back up plan for when traffic is piled up miles together. When I'm running back home and I'm tired, I leave HER early by taking Exit 7A, which offers me the alternate route to my home through I295 N, which by the way is the second best road for me in the USA. I have to say the competition is close! Exit 8 leads to Princeton and sure must be an important one but I've hardly ever been that way, so I'm not sure there is much to say.

I love HER at Exit 8A, which is where she splits into 2 tracks allowing the buses, the trucks and monster transporters to move away from the "Cars Only" path and makes life so safe and beautiful for me. I've not been much at Exit 9 but I was there one afternoon in sunny May and I have to say, it was a beautiful day. It was probably my shortest time with HER, only from Exit 5 to 9 and back, but that one hour will stay in my memory forever. It was one of those days I never wanted to end.

I love HER at EXIT 10, where I get directly into Edison, Indian capital of the USA and I love HER more at Exit 11, from where I can take the Garden State Parkway onward to 2 destinations I love being. One into Oaktree Road to go to Saravana Bhavan, which is where I'd rather eat out than any place else in the USA and the other towards Albany, which has become my favorite Thanksgiving destination off late.

I'm yet to explore Exit 12, but I love HER at Exit 13. This is what leads me to the Goethal's bridge, the Staten Island Expressway and further on to Verrazano and the Belt Parkway to finally hit JFK. This airport is 2 hours away versus Philadelphia, which is 30 minutes or Newark, which is an hour, but no one would believe how often I go there. Why I've already been there 2 times in this 1 week and it is a drive that has offered me some breathtaking views that I'll never forget.

I LOVE HER AT EXIT 13A. I've said much about this in my New Year 2010 Blog (referenced at the beginning of this piece), but I will say it again. Between Exits 13A and 14, 14A, B & C lies the Newark Liberty International Airport. I've said enough about how I can watch flights land and take off all day, but riding in a car at 60-70 miles an hour and having a flight take off or land right in your face and right above your head is just breathtaking. So many times this year, I've just wanted to pull up my car on the shoulder southbound on the turnpike near Exit 13A and just stand there and watch them come and go. Maybe next year...

Right after the Newark Airport stretch is a small mound on the road, on crossing which one is offered the first and most magestic view of Manhattan Island and as one treads past Exits 15E and 15W, one can still keep taking in the different views, including Jersey city on the other side of the river. Even if I have a job in New York city, I'd rather live in New Jersey, just to see this view everyday going to work. Believe me, I'd never get tired of it.

I HATE HER AT EXIT 16E. Because this is where I get off. But I have to thank HER at this point becuase that's where SHE leads me to the Lincoln Tunnel and into New York city, which is a lifelong love story in itself and about which I'd probably never stop talking...

You know what's funny? MY WIFE LOVES HER TOO! I'm sure for most of the reasons that I already do, but for one reason more than anything else. The NJTP is the one road that has the most consistent pattern of service areas, all of them replenished with rest rooms, restaurants and full service gas pumps. We've driven a lot over the North East but no other highway here is consistent in this matter. And wait, that's not even the single biggest reason, my wife likes the NJTP. Every one of these service areas has a Starbucks (which BTW is my favorite brand in the USA) and which is where my wife can stop for her most favorite cup of Tall Chai Latte, extra hot.

How much more can I say about HER? I'm starting to believe I can go on forever. It's 1015 AM on Friday Dec 31 and I have things to do like run to the Indian grocery store and get some Tea, which we incidentally ran out of, for my wife. Got to keep her happy, right? After all, she knows everything about me and my NJTP and what's more, she understands...

In case you're wondering, "Wait! This post should have been published last night, right?". Yes you're right. But I got back home only past midnight and was too tired to write. I WAS WITH HER FOR OVER 4 HOURS AND IT DIDN'T SEEM QUITE ENOUGH...

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Trying to Clean Up - 2010 Tribute, Part 8

2 days and 2 hours to go. "I've got to clean up", I've been telling myself. I'm not talking about the clothes or books lying about. I'm talking about taking all the disappointments, the anger, the frustrations, the mistakes and the losses of 2010 and purging them. I wish I could simply take all of this and flush them down. And start anew on 1 Jan 2011.

Sometimes I think I have taken 2010 too seriously. Agreed, there's a bunch of significant stuff that I have done in this year, but may be it was just a matter of timing. I think the fact that I got my MBA this year, which I had waited for over 15 years was a big deal. And I seem to have wrapped a lot of expecations around that and pushed myself too hard on some counts.

Sometimes I feel even this whole 11 days to 11 has been an outcome of that. In 2010, I have felt this need to have more and do more. I have felt the need to prove myself and the need to possess. A highly respected friend of mine summed it up very well. "It's human nature", he said, "the more you have the more you crave". On the dot, no questions about that, I have to say.

Now that this year is winding down and the last 50 hours are all we have, I also feel the need to assess myself. "What did I accomplish this year? What have I done to grow myself as a person and in my career? What have I done for my family?". Not only to assess what I have done, but also how I have done things. And somewhere in the process, I may feel I fell short of my own expectations, which is part of the reason for the anger, the frustration, the disappointment and the mistakes.

For a moment this afternoon, I considered shutting myself out from the world for the last 48 hours of this year. To neither make nor receive any phone calls, avoid any contact with the outside world and to listen to myself, to introspect, to analyze and to understand for myself, where I am, where I want to go and how to get there.

Now, I will certainly have to run to the store, the library, the airport etc. but what I mean by no human contact is to be there at any place but not BE THERE. Strangely enough, I have certainly developed that ability, though I can't truly call that a 2010 laurel. I guess, it's just a part of me, that's all.

I'm not complaining! 2010 has been a great year. It has been embellished with some magnificient moments and I can write several stories about them. I have had some successes that I always wanted to have in life. And more. That's precisely the problem becuase now that I have seen some, I want more. You are right Arun, you are.

I'm not smart. I don't pick my battles. I go after everything. But I don't give up.
I'll clean up and I'll clean up well. I don't know what I don't know about 2011 and onward, but one thing, I know for sure: I AM MY OWN COMPETITION!

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Sleepy, tired and confused - 2010 Tribute, Part 7

It's not unusual. I've had several nights like this one in 2010 when I am tired, stressed and confused. Some of them have been nights when I just could not sleep. I had important deliverables the next morning and I had to take the stretch. On other nights, I have just hit the sack and not cared about anything at all. Those were the nights I decided, whatever happens we will deal with tomorrow morning.

I've got to say I've come a long way. Not until long ago, I used to get very stressed about work. It would not have been so stressful if I had not been lazy and procrastinated on little things. I used to put things off, they would pile and then work would hit me like a ton of bricks. Those nights were the worst. I would not have the energy to do the work, so I would try to sleep it off, but when I woke up in the morning the work pile would still be there, staring at me.

I've clearly won over this tendency. I don't know if it was the 20 months handling a demanding job and also doing my MBA at the same time, but when a deliverable looms large, I either have the energy to sit up and get it done, no matter what, or have the conviction to handle the situation effectively given the amount of time and resource available. My approach in the latter case is direct. I own up what has not been done, but I always have a plan for how I will get it done and by when. Sounds like communication 101, right. True, but it was a long process of confidence building and I feel happy where I am today.

Tonight is of the first kind. We had been out this evening to get some things done and then decided to dine out, so we could just come back home and crash. When I got home, changed into my PJs and sat myself comfortably down on my bed was when I realised that I had promised myself to write 11 days continuously in the run up to 2011. I toggled between the choices I had for a little while and I seriously considered not writing this. But I realised soon that it would be sumitting to the circumstances and not putting up a fight. That would be betraying the goal I set for myself at the beginning of this year - to take stretch goals and accomplish them.

As you can see, I then converted my situation into the topic of this piece and have come this far. I got to say, I've come a long way. I can certainly take this farther and go on and on and about how I've overcome the fear of the future and all that, but it is 1015 PM and I have an early appointment to keep tomorrow, before which I need to get some work related items squared away. I just set my alarm for 445 AM, so I think it's best to save the rest for another day.

Especially given that my wife, who has been lying next to me for the last 15 minutes is not feeling sleepy at all and has been asking me several questions all the while, spanning a abroad range of topics from travel to fashion to medicine...

It promises to be another long night...

Monday, December 27, 2010

Wii, Me and My TV - 2010 Tribute, Part 6

This is the first time I a m writing from my wife's computer so please excuse any smelling pistakes. If I were writing this from a Balckberry I would have asked for Fat Fingered Erros to be Exused but this is quie the opposite. My wife's new cpomuter is a 17" monitored monster so I am literally running from one kwy to another in order to write tihs piece. I will try to feliver this without getting tired...

As I write this, my son, myself and my wofe are seated left to right on our beds and each have a laptop our laps, doing one thing or he other. I must say this is one of the accomplishments of 2010, not only to have a PC for each of us but also the fact that I was able to convomce my son to become the second owner of my wife's old laptop and that he readuly agreed without making any fuss. Full credit to him for that. Let me also give myself some credit here for getting my wife a 17", Intel i3 Core, 4 GB, 500 GB Dell Inspiron for jher birthday, which passed reently and about which I have already wrriten and am nopt going to waste anyu more time about.

Just to c;arify one additional point, my son is working on the computer he inherited from my wife and my wife and I swapped laptops today because she is preparing for a session coming ip and needed some specific information that I had on my laptop. That brings me to the real reason for this blog and all I have been doing so far is rambling.

My wife is travelling out of town later this week for a session she needs to deliver. As my son has time off from school for the holiday season, we had initially pondered thta we would all go by car, spend a couple of days out of town and return, but as she has been suffereing from a back ailment for a few days now, her doctor today ruled out teh possibility of car travle and strictly mentioned that she should fly. So we booked tickets for her to fly out WEndesday night and reytun Thursday night.

Now hat means that the boys will be alone at home. My son does not savor that a lot. I travle a lot and he can stay woithout me but he will never stay without his mother. This year was a landmark year in that for the first time, he slept in a different roon than us when we were recently visiting family in a different town, becuase he wanted to be with his cousing. So when we askjed him about his mother's upcoming trip, he readliy agreed that she alone should go given her heatlh and thet we should stay back.

While I was happy at this mature behavior, I was also not feeling food about disappointing him. He loves road trips and plane trips, more so. So just to make him feel happy, I asked him if he wanted to join his mother on her trip. I told him I would buy him a ticket on the same flight as her and that he could stay with out friends while she was out doing her thing. "No Dad, I will stay here", he readily said. My heart really swelled his proide at his concern to save me a co0upla hundred dollars and I told him how proud I was of him. And we let the matter rest at that point in time.

I was not convinced however and a little later, when we had finished dinner and were lazing on the couch, I asked him the same question again. He spontaneously refunsed the offer. At this point, it hit me. He would enjoy the plane ridfe and all that, but he would probably get bored at our friends' place, especially when my wife was away doing her own thing. "So is it becaue you dont want tto stay away from your Wii?", I asked him. "Kinda", he said. My wife felt rather sad because he chose the Wii over her and prodded him further. "Don't you like me? Don't you want to go with me?", she aksed.

"I like you ma but we need some Appa and Son lonely time", was his disgised response. "I don't see that happenning at all", my wife responded. "All I can see happening is Appa will be lonely in his own world and you will be lonely with your Wii and TV! Your dad does not even care what you do so he is going to be happy so long as yout stay out of his hair. But if I was at home I would never let you play all day. May be I should give you some homework before you go", she said and then completed her monologuie turning in my direction. "And if he doesn't complete the work I give him, I will hold you responsible. You will not get any food for a few days", was the empty threat she closed with.

I really admire my wife. She is spending her life's enerfy on making my son an intellectual super star who can sing Indian Classical Music, can break 2 inch think pine boards in Karate, will start a company that makes cars that will run on bio-fuel and do many many more things in this one life. And while doing all this, she has to cope with me, who is hell bent on letting my son be what he wants to be. To let him do only what he wants to do, whether it is Karate, cricket or climbing a tree!

I am sorry Pondatti. We both love you adn will do anything for you, we will pray that your session goes really well, will frop you at the arport and come back and picl you too, but just whjile you are gone, pleeeeeeeeeeeeease, let us be...

Just before I started writing this pieve, my son asked me how one writes a blog and before I could finish moine, he has used his gmail ID to create a Blogger account and has already published his first post... (http://tejaslkaushik.blogspot.com)

God thank you so much for my wonderfuil wife, my super awesone son, his Wii and TV...

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Lazy Days - 2010 Tribute, Part 5

This is beginning to become like Lopez Tonight on TBS. I am starting to do this 11 blogs for the last 11 days before 2011 only at 11 PM. I should really say Conan, but honestly I have seen a lot of Lopez tonight this year when it played at 11 PM but I have not seen even one episode of Conan since it started. This behaviior is also in line with the fact that I stayed up late a lot more thins year in the first 9 months when I was still at school and managing the job and the MBA, but not really so in the last couple of months, post my graduation on 9/11. Sorry, wrong timing Conan!

To be honest, I wouldn't have written this today. I am feeling lazy and it's Sunday night anyway. I'd rather go to bed and have an early start tomorrow because I have meetings starting 730 AM. It was my son who encouraged me to stay up and write. He has been very excited by the whole 11 days to 2011 concept and he felt I must not break the deal I made to myself. So thank you dear little fella. Now don't start asking me for money...

Well. I can certainly get away from that today, but not tomorrow. Today was a snow day and that was part of the reason I am lazy. I woke up to a dry, cloudy morning and after a couple of quick chores, decided to go do some shopping. I quickly showered, got all dressed up and looked out the window only to find that the flurries had begun. In a matter of minutes, it became quite thick and by the time my son and I had played a negotiation game on why we should not go to the toy store, the roads had started to get white. Incidentally, my son won the negotiation with me conceding a large cheese pizza with extra cheese from Papa John's for launch. It was the perfect setting for laziness.

I changed back into a pair of PJs, slumped into my couch with my laptop and started doign random stuff. I didn't even get up when the Pizza arrived. I asked my little fella to get it and my wife obliged by passing him the cash. He was hungry and excited by the responsibility and he carried it out proudly. He even brought be a plate, placed the pizza slices on it as I finished one after another, while my wife helped with the chilli flakes and the ketchup. From 1 PM to 6 PM, my laptop did not leave my lap and I did not leave my couch for a minute. I was only empowered by the fact that my wife decided to take an afternoon nap and my son decided to conquer his new Wii at everything it had to offer.

Two films followed. One 80s film on football called Little Giants and the other, an Indian film on Hockey (not the one played on ice) called Chak De. Both are inspirational films with the sport themes creating a perfect setting for strategies, planning and sheer adrenaline. This was interwoven with a dinner of Indian rice cakes (Idli) and dessert that combined Red Velvet Cheesecake and fine Indian Rosogollas. Then came the tough part. My wife called in sick and I had to spend 30 minutes away from the couch cleaning up dishes. But I did return in time for the end of the second film and that is when my son played persistent that I should write this piece.

I am not unhappy either. I didn't believe I could write so much when I started writing but this is turning out to be a good one. Talking about lazy days reminds of me what a friend was saying today. She was starting to get surprised by how she could spend entire days watching TV or browsing and I had little ground to disagree with her. I totally love lazy days and could go on and on about the various ways I could spend a day doing nothing! However, the one that tops the list for me is sitting at an airport and watching planes land and take off. Seriously, I could do that all day.

Add to that my laptop with access to a power source and plenty of Starbucks coffee and it would be the story of how I started of how I started writing like this in the first place. But I guess that's a story for another day. It's well past the 11 PM mark and soon it will be time for Lopez tonight on TBS (remember, it got moved to midnight since Conan came it at 11!). Oh! wait. Today is Sunday and Lopez tonight is only on week nights. I guess, it's Lopez's lazy day too!

"Can someone carry me to my bed please", my son is saying. "I got to wake up early tomorrow and clean the snow off our car. And that will be $5 please, thank you."

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Why I Believe in Santa Claus - 2010 Tribute, Part 4

Last night when my son set up the milk for Santa and filled his wishlist, I wished pink health for all, especially my wife who has been suffering from a gastro-enterological ailment for the last 4 days and the 5 day old boy of our new neighbours.

The wife comes first. She has been trying her trusted home remedies for the last 4 days and every morning she would wake up saying she was feeling better, only to get worse through the day. By Thursday, it was clear to me that she needed medical attention but she seemed to think differently. She made a half hearted attemt to reach her GI specialist on Friday morning but told me that their offices were closed as it was Christmas eve and continued with her home remedeies.

What forced me to put her on Santa's wish list on Christmas eve was that after 6 to 7 hours of rest that day, she was still in pain. She had endured this for 4 days and if I had this same pain I wouldn't have lasted even 1.

Cut to Christmas AM. After I had woken up at 4 AM and been on the road for another 6 to fetch the grandmother of the ailiing neighbour's kid from JFK International, my wife offered me a hot cup of tea and asked me if I could try the doctor again. I tried and got the voicemail and left a message which I had been promised would be returned the next business day, which was 2 days away. The other 2 options on the voicemail were to either call 911 if it was an emergency or if the caller was a hospital or a doctor's office, to call the messaging service.

I started to think that I may need to go the ER route, when my son came and asked me why Santa had not given me my wish of pink health for my wife. "I believe in him and he will make her alright today", I said. I did not know what prompted me to say that but I immediately picked up the phone and called the doctor's office again and heard the menu options clearly. "You are calling after office hours", it said. "If this is an emergency, call 911, if this is a hospital or a doctor, call xyz number to reach the messaging service and all others please leave a message and we will respond on the next business day". I noted the messaging service number and called them.

They picked up after the 2nd ring and asked me who I was and I told them I was the husband of the patient of Dr. Chauhan. "What's your wife's name?", was the next question. After I had spelled from P for Peter to A for Apple on the first name and from L for Larry to N for Nancy on the last name, she asked me what the problem was. I mentioned the problem and the lady on the line told me that she would page the doctor and that someone would be in touch with us shortly and also took down my phone number.

Ten minutes later, at noon on Christmas day (Saturday), our phone rang and on the line was Dr. Chauhan. My wife explained to him what her problem was and he told her what she needed to do for redress and also promised to call in a prescription to the closest pharmacy. At 2 PM, I collected the medicines and aftee lunch, she took them and took an afternoon nap.

She woke up at 6 PM and when she walked into the kitchen for her tea, I knew my wife was back. It's 10 minutes to midnight and she has cleared the laundry, served us dinner, cleaned up after, helped my son clean up his closet and we have been watching TV for the last couple of hours, enjoying every minute of this saturday evening.

And even as we were doing all this, I received a call from our neighbours who are in the hospital that their 5 day old son is doing fine and is functioning normally, though he will still be there until tomorrow night in order to receive the results of all the tests, but the doctors say he is stable.

We're now watching Michael Jackson's Black or White on youtube and he just sang the line "I believe in miracles and a miracle has happened tonight". Michael and Santa must have caught up at some point today, maybe over a cup of hot chocolate and marshmallows...

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!

P.S. Somewhere between all this, My son got what he asked for, a Mario Kart Wii game with a steering wheel. Thank you Santa!!!

Friday, December 24, 2010

Christmas Eve Special - 2010 Tribute, Part 3

It's 45 minutes to Christmas, and children around the world have gone to sleep thinking about what they will find under the Christmas tree when they wake up. It is a night of hope and dreams and everything that is most beautiful in life.

We just finished watching Santa Clause 2 and the last thing my son said before he tucked himself in was, "Mom, could you make sure you keep out some milk for Santa before you go to sleep?" The only thing he will see in his sleep tonight is a new game for his new Wii, for that is what he wishes most this Christmas. And he will be up no later than 7 AM to check what is under the tree (we have a little one and we've left the lights on tonight!).

And here I am, as has been the case in the last 2 nights, trying to fulfil my holiday season wish of writing 11 blogs in the last 11 days of the year and so far in the first 3 days have started or ended the writing in the 11th hour, no sooner. The last 2 days, it was work, today it was more fun, but no denying that this is becoming a habit. I got 34 minutes more, so I might as well say something meaningful before it's too late.

Early in my work life, when I was in advertising, I read an article that proposed that the appearance of Santa Claus that we all have come to know and believe with the Red Dress, the White beard and the works was actually created in the 1930s or 40s by Coca Cola advertising for the Christmas season that year, what with RED being the color of Coke. I was amused by the article at that time and thought it was interesting.

Today, even as I am sitting on my bed writing this at 7 minutes to midnight, I know that Santa will be here for sure tonight and my son will find his wish fulfilled when he wakes up tomorrow morning and looks in his stocking. And given the certainty that Santa will be here, I made sure I penned in my wish too on the wish list my son left under the tree.

"Dear Santa, give us a 2011 filled with pink health. Leave us in our stocking unbounded energy to work hard and help as many people as we can. Drink our white milk and leave us pure bliss for everything material we need, we already have."

I am going to sign off now as I need to be up at 4 AM and drive 2 hours to JFK to pick up our neighbours' mother in law who will arrive from India. Their one week old son is unwell and they will be tending to him in the ER of the Cooper Hospital in Philadelphia.

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL.

Thursday, December 23, 2010

For Old Time's Sake - 2010 Tribute, Part 2

It's 1023 PM Thursday night. I'm up trying to write and my eyes are closing.

Deja vu. How many times have I done it this year. Open up my homework on Thursday evening (due in class on Friday), work very late into the night and get hardly 2 hours of sleep because I had to be at the bus station at 530 AM in order to be at school on time. The one difference tonight is that I won't be staying up that long. A) I've got to finish writing this by midnight in order to be considered today's piece and B) I have already done the late into the night last night so I am not going to repeat it today. Also given that tomorrow is Christmas eve and it's a Holiday and there is no homework due at 845 AM. I'll probably not even be awake by then...

Let me talk about last night for a moment. I slept at 415 AM (this morning technically). I had decided earlier this season that just before the Holidays, I would send all my colleagues who helped me in my job this year a personal message to thank them for their support. It would be a way of showing my gratitude and the best way to close the year personally. I've been working on it for over a week now but never got to it given cartloads of work during the week and the trip to Boston over the weekend. Monday and Tuesday evening this week did not lend themselves to this either and when I got off work last evening, it looked like the perfect time to get it done.

Murphy's law took control of my life at the exact same moment and I had to do 2 trips to my son's Karate Class and to the Indian grocery store, courtesy having run out the door without my wallet the first time. And then when I came back, I had to get dinner and then help my wife clean up the kitchen as she was unwell and that was the least I could do for her. The good part was, I still felt good after all that work. The curtains were drawn and I joined my son in bed armed with my laptop. I had a few work items to take care of and that took me to 11 PM. Then came last nights blog (part 1). And a little after midnight, still feeling good, I embarked on this task.

I went on and on and the next thing I know, it was 415 AM. But I felt on top of the world when I had it done. Not only because I had done a good deed but had retained the energy and focus to get it all done despite it being a big stretch. I started this year promising myself that I will take stretch goals and achieve them and here I was, at it again. What added more joy to it was that this was really the first time after the completion of my MBA that I was doing this. I could have really done this over the weekend, but I would have missed the timing. Christmas is Saturday.

I had a perfect day today. I was up at 745 AM, logged in to my first phone meeting at 8 and did everything like clockwork till it was 10 minutes to 5 PM. After a cup of coffee to energize myself, I slept. I have been active again since 6 PM, cleaning up the house, visiting our negihbours who just had a baby boy, dinner and then cleaning up. It's 11 PM now and Home Alone 2 just got over on ABC Family's 25 Days of Christmas movies. And I'm looking good for another long night, with only one difference.

The screen I will be looking at tonight made by a company called Samsung, is 32 inches long measured diagonally, emits a multitude of bright colors and moving images.

It is the most wonderful time of the year...

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Ten Day Tribute to 2010, Part 1

40 minutes to go, 50 things to say on a day that is only 10 away from the New Year.

2010 has been a special year no doubt. It was the year I returned to India for the first time in 3 years. It was also the year I drove 8 hours to Canada from the USA. But talking of travelling, it was also the year I reached a new high and that too in terms of sheer decibel level. It was the year I first listened to music on my car radio at FULL VOLUME - 40/40.

Now if you are a kid reading this or if you are reading this to your kids, WARNING: Don't try this at your home or even in your car. It is just insane. I don't know why I did it and I am sure I will do it again, but that's no reason anyone of you should.

It was also the year I travelled the maximum distance in my car without my driver's license on me. What I realised after reaching the Indian grocery store that is 10 miles away is that I in fact did not have my wallet on me (and hence my license). It was also the year I called my wife and asked her if the Indian grocery store was in the habit of providing stuff on the barter system, but all I had on me were the clothes that I was wearing and it would not have been a very pleasant thing to barter them for grocery.

It was a year when I saw the sun rise one morning over the Atlantic Ocean. It was a year in which I fell asleep at a meeting one afternoon. It was a year in which I had nights that never ended and days that I wished would never end. It was a year when I first wore a French beard and it was the year I first tasted French champagne. It was year with plenty of colors but a little gray in between.

It will the year I have written the most blogs in the last 3 and it will also be the year I missed a flight busy writing a blog at an airpot. But talking again of travel, it was also the year I attained Silver Elite status on Continental Airlines. Looking back, it was a year in which I did many good things and some silly ones too. After all, it was the year my sister got married and I got (I almost forgot) my MBA.

There's more to talk about 2010 and I hope to do it over the next 9 days...

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

11 to 11...

It's 11 days to 2011 and I've decided to break the shackles. So at 11 something PM, I decided to write the 11th blog of this year (just to break the 6, 8, 10 pattern).

I don't have much to say except that it has been a foody last four days. What started with our drive to Boston on Saturday the 18th, the visits with friends and relatives, the feasts at my wife's cousins baby shower and after our return, at dinner with our most wonderful neighbours today. I must say, it is the most wonderful time of the year. The only thing missing so far has been that big snowfall. The lights are all out all over the place and about the shopping, don't even get me started. Every time I go to the plaza or the mall, I have to cirle the parking lots a couple of times before I find someone who is pulling back, only to find someone else already waiting with their giant SUV to pull in there. So what can a meek Honda Accord do but gently roll away and find the farthest spot from the store I meant to go and walk all the way up and down in the cold wind? "How do you eat so much and stay so thin?", asked my host today at dinner. Want to hear more?

This is just like last week. My son and wife are asleep after a long tiring day and I found that teeny weeny ounce of energy to stay up and write this. When I thought of the 11 days to 2011 concept this morning, I was excited about it, but I knew this was going to be a long day, but I kept telling myself that I should not give up and try to keep my composure and get this piece in tonight. I am glad I resisted hitting the sacj straightaway and did this. For I want 2011 to be not just about inspirational ideas that appear at meteoric intervals but the power of discipline, perseverance and execution. So I decided to push myself the extra few minutes at the end of a tiring day. And I want to say, it didn't turn out bad at all. The key now is to do this day after day for the next 10 days, with unfaltering commitment. And that would probably set the tone for the next year to come and many more.

2010 was special in many ways. 2011 will be even better. And in this 11 day run up to 2011, I will try and capture here some of the special moments of the year that is running out and some of the things I want to do in the year coming up. It's lights out and soon it will be 11 minutes to midnight and only 10 days to the new year. So good night world, happy Wednesday morning India and happy rest of the evening all ye in sunny California.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

10 at 10...

It's my 10th Blog of the year. And I'm beginning it at 10 PM EST. I always wanted to write this 10th one. I started blogging in 2008 and I wrote 6 that year. I moved up to 8 last year and so when I wrote the 8th one this year, I told myself I will write at least 10 to close out year 2010.

But I never expected that I will write this under such circumstances. At 10 PM, forced not to sleep by a severe acid reflux and having to sit up straight. "I have to sit up anyway, so let me do something useful", I thought and sincerely picked up my computer thinking I will plan for tomorrow. But then I remembered my vow to get to 10 and changed my mind.

It's also the right setting I guess. I just put my son to sleep a little while ago and my wife just said goodnight too. They're tired. The last 2 days were the most important days of their lives and they had a lot going on. My wife used to celebrate her birthday on Dec 14th every year, but ever since our little fellow was born one day before her birthday 9 years ago, the routine has changed. She now celebrates his birthday on Dec 13 and ends up cleaning up after on hers.

Especially when his birthday falls on a Monday it's a double whammy. She had to prepare all Saturday for his surprise party on Sunday including baking 60 cookies and making rasamalai and when Sunday came, it was time to manage 10 hyperactive kids in our small 2 bedroom apartment for over 2 hours while they were on cookies, candy, juice and ice cream cake. I was surprised that she managed to get them to play a game of monopoly for 45 minutes and then draw snowmen blindfolded for another 45.

And then there was Monday itself. HIS BIG DAY. She had to drop him off at school, ensure he was safely escorted to his class with the big glass bowl of cookies. Children are not allowed to take candy to school for their birthday, but obvioulsy she was more worried about her big glass bowl! Then she had to do voluntary work at his school, make lunch and once he was back from school, make him do his home work, take him to his Karate class, enetertain her friends who came to wish him until late in the evening and help us get dinner.

The cleaning up did not end until late this evening, which was HER BIG DAY itself, the only sane hour she had in between being when she sat down with us to watch a TV show while we had Pizza (we ordered Papa John's for dinner). And then she did not even retire till she had cut vegetables for tomorrow, sealed them in a ziploc bag and stored them in the freezer.

Even after she hit the bed, she remembered that she had forgotten something and she requested me to turn on the dishwasher. If it had not been for my acid reflux and if I had not seen the benfit in the short walk to the kitchen, she would have certainly had to do it herself. As amiable as I may seem, I seldom budge after I have tucked myself two layers deep into my cozy bed and especially when my laptop is firmly enconsed on a cushion on top of my lap (rhetoric). But today, she won.

Sometimes, I feel sad for her. I love my son and all that but he certainly has taken away her special day. I know the rest of the week won't be any better because there will be more volunteering at school, more Karate Class and then there will be the Library, grocery and a million other things to take care of. And she will do all of them patiently and with a smile on her face.

Wait, next Wednesday is the the day of the Winter Party at my son's school, so the preparation for that will start tomorrow. And then there's Christmas presents to buy for her best friends and before the year runs out, she would have invited at least a handful of people home for lunches and dinners or at least made something special and taken it in a bowl to share with neighbours.

Sometimes, I feel she just loves this cleaning up after. She never seems to get tired of it. She will never drop the ball and no matter how messy a given day was, she will always show up the next morning. Sometimes, I wish some of the people I work with at work were like her. She's one amazing woman, my wife and I am blessed to have her in my life.

It's almost 1115 and I know what you are thinking. So what do I do while she's doing all this? "Who, ME?". Not much really. I just stay up late on her birthday and write blogs.

HOPE MY FAVORITE FELLOW AND WONDERFUL WIFE EACH HAD A GREAT BIRTHDAY IN 2010. AND WILL HAVE MANY MORE HAPPY ONES TO COME.

Friday, December 3, 2010

It's the most wonderful time of the year...

It's that time of the year when the Starbucks cups turn Red
It's that time of the year when hot chocolate with marshmallows is "IN"

It's that time of the year when Bryant Park becomes an ice skating rink
It's that time of the year when Rockefeller Center becomes the center of the world

It's that time of the year when naughty children become GOOD
It's that time of the year when fat men become jolly Santas!


It's that time of the year when ABC Family plays 25 days of Christmas movies
It's that time of the year when radios play "It's the most wonderful time of the year"

It's that time of the year when the earth sometimes turns White.
Why, it's that time of the year when even Chennai sometimes turns COOL!

Even though it's that time when I spend what I am going to earn next year
It's indeed the most wonderful time of the year...

HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO ALL!

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Up in the Air

710 pm EST, 28 October 2010. A little over an hour left before I touchdown at Newark's Liberty International Airport. I left the San Antonio International Airport at 330 CST, so you do the math on how long I have been on this flight or will be. I look out the window and it has just turned dark outside. The light from the wing of the aircraft has just started flickering. I remember the famous ending line from the movie Up in the Air starring the irresistible George Clooney. "The stars will wheel forth from their daytime hiding places; and one of those lights, slightly brighter than the rest, will be my wingtip passing over."

I saw the movie a second time this week. The first time I saw it was when I was "up in the air" going from Philadelphia to Frankfurt on my way to India this summer. Nice coincidence, isn't it? I was instantly impressed by it. After all the movie won several oscars, did it not? I'm trying to think what it was about the movie that I liked. I guess there were several things. First of, Ryan Bingham, the protagonist (played by George Clooney), is on the road (or should I say up in the air!) all the time. He has a job firing people (that's the tough part of the movie) and he LOVES TRAVELLING. Ask my wife if that sounds like me.

Numbers mean a lot to him (just like me again, also see my 10/10/10 post). In fact his very GOAL in life is a number. His goal is to accumulate 10 million miles on American Airways and become only the 7th person in the world to do it on any airline. And like all good movies, he does achieve it at the end. The sweetest part is he even uses 1 million of the 10 to send his sister and brother in law on a world tour as it is something that they would have loved to do but don't have the money to. Now, my dear sister in Indiana, I know what you are thinking but as you always say, "pirkaalathula paakalam" (let's see later!).

George Clooney looks great and his acting is top notch. And there is this cute girl (there has to be a cute girl for me to like anything!!!) who plays not the heroine of the film, but Clooney's colleague and whom he mentors and this time for a change I liked the cute girl not because she is cute but there is a certain element of strength in her character. She is a confident career woman who has a failed relationship and a big work idea that blows right in her face but after just a brief emotional burst, she retains her composure and bounces right back into life. She moves on. It's a kind of strength I have grown to admire in people and this character in this movie just brought it home again for me.

And then there are several other things. The movie has all the right elements. Funny moments, sweet gestures, poignant points and outright emotional events. The perfect mix of tones a successful movie must have. But more so the elements I think I have always associated with in life, even some of the moments I have truly lived, so to say. Even as I watched this movie a first time, it brought back to me several memories and associations from my own life. When I watched it the second time this week, I was completely consumed by it and at the end I was awestruck. And now it is clear to me why I like this movie. Up in the Air is so much up my alley ,or should I say, in some ways, Ryan Bingham was so "ME".

The flight attendant just announced that all electronic devices must be shut off and I will do that now. But before I go, I have just one thing to share. I called Continental Airlines yesterday and they told me that this flight I am on today will be the 30th segment I have travelled on their airline this year. And when I land in Newark in a few minutes from now, I will qualify for the Silver Elite status of the their OnePass Miles program. I still have a few miles to go for 10 million. And I will start that journey with my connecting flight to Philadelphia an hour later. But rest assured, Ryan Bingham, here I come.

P.S. Up in the Air just joined my all time favorite English movies after Shall we Dance, Indecent Proposal and School of Rock!

Sunday, October 10, 2010

10/10/10

My life is all about numbers. When I have a lot to do, I like to wake up at 345 am. When I have an important email to send I look at the clock at the bottom right of my computer and see what the time is. It's nothing specific but it has to be some interesting combination, like 1234 pm, maybe! It's not just about time. I seem to remember numbers very well, whether it is long account numbers or exit numbers on the highways (what is where?) So when it comes to dates that have interesting combinations, there is no doubt I try to make special meaning from them. Today is 10/10/10 and was certainly a nice Sunday. I learnt how to cook Rava Kesari, went to the temple after a long time, had a good Indian meal and had a good 2 hour afternoon nap. I would have certainly liked to accomplish something more today, but I am happy how the day went. I just remembered that on 09/09/09 I completed my PMP certification. Not a big accomplishment at all, but it was a personal milestone for me because I had 3 weeks to accomplish it between 2 terms of my MBA. And my MBA graduation itself happened exactly one month ago on 09/11/10, which was also my 10th wedding anniversary. Those who follow me on facebook know how much of a super special day that was. Come to think of it, 10 itself is a rather significant number in my life. After all, I was born on the 10th of June. Which is perhaps why 10/10/10 has been intruiging for me for quite a while. I have been thinking all week long that I should make good use of this day and want to make it special in every way. It was, I have to say. And as I sit here in my writing this, just before I go to bed, I am trying to think of one thing I want to leave the day with, like a goal or a message for myself. The first thing that occurs to me is, what can I do to make myself "10 Times Better" in every way. I have to be true and say I would Ten Times the pay, but I guess it is more than money. I want to be 10X better in relationships, I want to be 10X better at my work, I want to be a 10X better husband and a father, I want to be 10X better by health and...
I can go on and on and on but I promised myself I will finish and post this piece at 10 pm and I have only one minute left. If you are reading this, I hope 10/10/10 was as good to me as it was to you and I wish you that life is better 10 times in every way. Have a great day.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Stunning Songs with Shocking Faces

Music lovers of yore have made many a collection before. Of their favorite actors, music directors or films of a certain genre or age. As a film music lover, I have many including my favorite film songs, my favorite Kamal songs and even mix of hindi and tamil songs. But of all my collections the one that is ever so special to me is this one - Stunning Songs with Shocking Faces!

I present here this collection that I have painstakingly put together with a lot of thought and perspiration. Before you read on, thanks to youtube for making so life interesting that I can present this to you in the form of my words and the actual song, with full video (without which, this collection would really have no meaning). And most important of all - DISCLAIMER - I mean no disrespect to any of the human beings who featured as heros in these songs but honesty being a virtue I treat above all, these guys had no place in the movies.

Most of these are Ilayaraja songs, trust middle class Madras in the 1980s to provide this crazy conundrum. But even as you read through this, do spend time to listen to these GEMS. Believe me, each of these songs is one that I have listened to all day long on repeat mode. IMPORTANT: When you get to the links, right click on them and open them in a new window.

1. I really have to start with this one becuase not only was it featured in the movie I least expected it to be in, Anbulla Rajanikant, but when I saw this song for the first time, I was really - SHOCKED! And hence the title of this collection. A fine tune indeed, with a subtle rythm and sublime violin bits. Start your journey with Vintage Ilayaraja.

Then Poove Poove Vaa, Anbulla Rajanikant
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cOq_dcN8j6Q

2. We call these heros one-film wonders and I simply cannot understand how directors were able to cast such characters in their films. May be the title of the film justified such a selection, after all it was titled Kokkarakko ("that's not even a word", my son would say). The song however is another soft and fine melody. Notice how there is a certain pace to the song but that pace is generated not by solid drum beats but a super-speed tabla. Wow indeed! Enjoy another nice one.

Geetham Sangeetham, Kokkarakko
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDTSRf_m1DU

3. Trust a director like Bharathiraja to try new things, new subjects and of course new faces. Rumour has it that he met this man in a shop in Madurai and decided to cast him in his next film. Honestly, this hero did not do badly either. He did go on to get some hits, though not as much as the heroine, who is sheer talent incarnate. The film, Mann Vasanai, was a super hit, a landmark film of sorts and the song is a real stunner indeed. Starting with a magnificient violin bit and going on to be one of the most soothing songs I have ever heard in the tamil language, the effect of this song is so calming on the mind. Pay attention to the ghamakas of SPB and Janaki towards the end of the charanams. This song is a classic.

Pothi Vecha Malligai Mottu, Mann Vasanai
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B0Vko5DAOlE

4. This film rocked the music world - Kathal Oviyam. And it does even today in the homes of die-hard Ilayaraja fans from Chennai to California. It was a typical melodrama of the 1980s and had that Nenjai Kasakki Puzhiyum quality about it. Honestly the hero was not too bad in the context. A blind man in an obscure village deep-down south should expect to bear that quality but just given that cinema is all that glitters and is glossy, he did fall short. I did not know which song to present from this one because each song in this film is a beauty but I present here my favorite one which bears a quality that I simply love. Lazy, non-chalant but supremely elegant. Easily, Ilayaraja at his best...

Nadiyil Aadum Poovanam, Kadhal Oviyam
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EiuSzCwgrT4&feature=PlayList&p=5B4FD3D91C5ECF83&playnext_from=PL&playnext=1&index=2

5. I don't know much about this film - Pagalil Oru Iravu. About the hero, the lesser said the better. But this song is MAGIC. It has a magnetic quality about it. The soft strains of melody seep into your system and move you from within. Listen to this song with eyes closed and the music plugged into your ears and you will know exactly what I am talking about. Wah, Raja!

Ilamaienum Poongatru, Pagalil Oru Iravu
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GD9a3qyWUBY

6. Another Ilayaraja, Bharathiraja combination. But this film, Mudhal Mariyadhai, also had the larger than life Sivaji Ganesan in the most understated role of his life, yet one his best performances ever. Every song from this movie was a stunner but to retain the soul of this collection, I have to chose the one with the sorry face in it. This song is a rustic charmer and has in it the raw power of love, that can surely tear you heart out. So much power in fact that I have been sitting here at the Philadelphia airport, listening to this song over and over again for the last 3 hours. So much power indeed, that I did not even realise that I actually missed my flight which was due to leave at 705 PM, thinking it was late and had not arrived yet. Experience this power for yourself, even as I rebook myself on the 910 PM US Airways Express to Rochester, New York ...

Andha Nilavathaan, Mudhal Mariyadhai
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y9Qv8-wRmEI

7. There has to be an exception for everything so I present here the only non-Ilayaraja song. Though not from my favorite composer, this one is sung by my favorite tamil film singer of current times - Karthik. The film is called Anbu and the first time I heard this song, I flipped. It is a sharp contrast to the other songs I have presented here, with a nice pace, music heavily orchestrated with modern instruments and a element of sheer cheer. But the problem is, I heard this song first (may be I did not know about youtube at that time). And then one fateful day, I saw this song. For the first and last time. This song is a double-whammy, both the hero and the heroine are horrendous. My sincere suggestion is to just listen to this song on Raaga.com or someplace but for the brave of heart who insist, here is the link. Please, at least close your eyes and let your ears be treated. Karthik rocks!

Aval Yaar Aval, Anbu
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXw3QAdI3XY

It is 845 PM and my flight should be leaving here in another 25 minutes so I will go now and let you go too. I hope I inspired you to make some strange collections like this one and at the same time, I hope you enjoyed the songs I love and cherish so much.

If you have similar songs that you think you can add to this collection, please comment on this piece or email me at lakshminarayan.balasubramaniam@gmail.com

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Birthday Vows!

10 June 10

God, this is the BEST birthday of my life. "This day is very special to me", I said. "This is the day I was born in this world and this day I am KING", I added. "No matter what happens, I will make sure I enjoy every minute of this day and no force of nature can stop me from doing that", I vowed.

These were tall statements indeed for somone who had woken up alone in a hotel, far away from home and was about to face the most empty day of his life at work. I had been invited by my client for a meeting here today and have been here for the last 2 days preparing for this. At the end of the 2 days of real hard work, I was told that I was really not needed for the meeting. What a wonderful thing to do to me. If they had told me I was not needed for this meeting, I would have done all the prep work and caught the last flight back home last night and at least woken up in my bed with my wonderful wife and sweet son. Not to be.\

Yet, I vowed to make this a special day.

Even when I made the vow, I was angry. Something told me last evening that things were not right, but I persisted. I just wanted to make it right. So I did everything I should do, I made an effort. After all that I didn't feel good going to bed and I didn't sleep right either. So no wonder that I woke up feeling miserable. Not just in my mind but my stomach was also in big trouble. And I had to visit the bathroom quite a few times before it was all well. What do you know, no one except my dutiful wife really called to wish me till I was almost ready to walk out the door to work.

Yet, I vowed to make this a special day.

I did go to work, I showed up. I was made to sit on the sidelines, but that did not shake me up. I organized my thoughts on what all I could accomplish in the half day and set myself to work. Emails came and emails went and then came the email which announced to all my company's employees in the US who all were celebrating their birthday today. My name was the first in the list and some well wishers who noticed it emailed me and wished me. Life was turning sunny. Many, but my boss wished me a Happy Birthday. We all get so many emails in a day, but when you don't get the one email you are waiting for, that doesn't leave you anywhere.

Yet, I vowed to make this a special day.

A one dollar breakfast was all I had had. Knott's strawberry cookies were worth that much in the vending machine in the break room at the office. So by the time it was noon, I was hungry. The meeting was still on, though I was not a part of it and there was food too. I walked out and inspected the spread. I rightfully assumed that though I was not part of the meeting, I was at least part of the lunch. That's how it had been in the last 2 days and my colleagues had even been kind to order vegetarian stuff the last 2 days. But not today. I did not see anything that looked vegetarian and when I asked our office manager if that was the case, she sincerely apologized and said that she forgotten to order any vegetarian food.

Yet, I vowed to make this a special day.

Off I went to the Indian restaurant 5 minutes away. Palak Panneer, Channa Masala, Alu Gobi, Naan, Basmati Rice and Kheer later, I was feeling really good. The clouds had passed and the sun was out again. I walked out of the restaurant a sated man and walked in to the office 5 minutes later (give or take a few). The office manager was waiting for me and let me know that the client was looking for me. When I walked into the conference room, where everyone was sinking their teeth into their happy sandwiches, my client announced proudly in front of 10 others that she had some FEEDBACK for me. No mention of the all the great work we had done in the last 2 days, but just FEEDBACK.

Yet, I vowed to make this a special day.I wrapped up my work at half past one and started my drive to the airport. I hit the highway and stuck to the right most lane. My wife has told me not to drive fast and I ardently follow that instruction. As I was approaching an exit, a car coming in from the exit refused to yield and so I tried to move out to the next lane and right in my blind spot was a big van who quickly swerved to his left, skilfully avoided me and honked as he passed me at what seemed like a 100 miles an hour. I recovered fast from the jerk and stayed slow on the right most lane and soon reached the airport. It's only 20 minutes away anyway. But ah! I had forgotten to fill up the rental car with gas and the attendant was all smiles when he handed me a fuel charge of $13.99 added to the rental cost.

Yet, I vowed to make this a special day.

"I hate small planes", said my neighbour at 5F. He was huge. 6 ft something and built well. He shouldn't have been flying this plane at all, but the plane ride was not so bad from the discomfort of having to sit next to him. It was the spots of bad weather where the flight was shaking like it was in a giant mixer that was scary. Imagine starting the day with a bad stomach, still indulging in an Indian buffet and then going through this ardor. I still landed safely, my stomach in shape and walked from terminal F to E to avail the airport shuttle. My phone was completely out of charge and I managed just the one call to my wife to let her know I should be home by 530 (it was 430 then). And like luck would have it, I found an electrical socket to charge my phone and what could be better, the shuttle made me wait for 45 minutes so I was able to fully charge my phone.

Yet, I vowed to make this a special day.

I called my wife the moment I was in the shuttle and told her I should be home my 615 PM. My son was waiting to go to his music class and he wanted me to take him today. He is the apple of my eye, alright, and I assured my wife I would be on time to take him. We crossed Walt Whitman bridge, passed the crowded section of route 76 and hit I295 North at exit 26. All I could see was a mile of cars, bumper to bumper. What a sight it was. One of the most wonderful machines created ny man, lined up by the million. When we passed exit 30 and the traffic started clearing up, I started to breathe again and was waiting for exit 40 when we would get off and get home. But that was not to be. We took exit 36 to drop off another passenger.

Yet, I vowed to make this a special day.

My shuttle is now pulling up into my apartment community and it is 630 PM. My son should have been in his class right now but is dutifully waiting for me to take him there. I will now transfer from the shuttle straight to my 2005 Blue Honda Accord and off we will be gone. And here is my wife at the parking lot with a cup of hot tea in her hand and a water bottle for me for the ride.

Believe me, Nothing can stop me from having a great day today.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MYSELF.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Everything I thought I'd be...

Everytime I do something like that, I smile. It brings back memories. It's everything I always wanted to be and everything I have almost never been. It's everything I have never wanted to do in life, but have always ended up doing. I like to think the smile is a sign of maturity, because whatever I did that made me smile, was sheer folly!

I've screwed up. Several times at that in the last couple of months, that smile has graced my lips. I'm sorry. I wish I could go back and change everything. I look ahead. I try and see if I will learn and correct myself. I only smile again. It's really not what I thought it'd be.

I try to think through this. I was so sure I would never be like this. May be I was naive. "Nothing can shake me", I believed. Youthful bravado, I presume. I swore that whatever may come my way, I will hold on to what I dearly believe. I do, hardly.

I don't want to give up, not yet. This is the way it was meant to be. I hope. All I have is what I believe. I have no doubt. What will be, will surely be. I only want to look ahead. Not behind and see why this happened to me. I want to try. I want to be what I really wanted to be.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

When I'm sitting in the couch and singing this song, you know...

It's sitting in my head and refusing to leave me.

It happens sometimes. It's like chocolate cake. When it's there, it takes control of your life. You know you've eaten plenty today, but you can't resist some more. So even though you put it back in the fridge after 2 large helpings telling yourself, "This is it!", you just can't control yourself. You walk by the fridge a couple of times painfully swallowing the saliva that is flooding your mouth. And then by the third attempt, you say, "To hell with it, I'll go and burn it off tomorrow". So out it comes again from the fridge and you then take a healthy third helping and this time you eat it slowly so you can savor it to the very last lick. Yes, you have to lick that spoon till it is dry...

I'm sitting in my car, on my way to the doctor's office and I am listening to this song for the millionth time in the last few days. It happens sometimes. I get a new CD that has a bunch of different songs and then one in the middle hits me in the jugular. I like all the songs in the CD, but this one is special. So when I come back to this song a second time, I listen to it closely and then I play it again. A second time. And then a third and and then I don't quite leave. It's like nothing else matters. I'm so smitten by this song. The more I listen to it, the more it reaches deep in me. Soon, it's running in my blood. And of course, sitting in my head.

Ah! The chocolate cake. Why the elaborate explanation of chocolate cake? Because when I was in my car today on the way to the doctor's office, I realized I had listened to this song a millionth time and I actually removed the CD from the player and put on another one. And then it happened. I got that fateful phone call. Luckily, it didn't last long and I was free to return to my music again. But you know what I did. I removed the CD I had just inserted in the player and reverted to the one I had removed only a few minutes ago. "Loading", it said, but I couldn't wait. I was rubbing my index and middle fingers against my thumb waiting to reverse to track 16 the moment the player indicated it was ready to play the music.

And then it happened. The song started and it sent that same tingle into my heart as it did the first time I heard. This was it. This was the third slice of chocolate cake... The problem for me is, I don't stop at 3. I heard the same song tens of more times by the time I had finished my doctor's appointment, run to the grocery store, picked up my son from karate and come back home. And once I came home, I asked my son to play it on the computer. And then on youtube. We've since moved to other songs and American Idol on Fox 29, but there's this little genie in my head is singing this song to me. And I don't mind. Actually, I'm enjoying it...

It's happened all my life. It's different songs at different times. But they all have the same quality. They hit me right in the gut the first time I hear them. And then I listen to them ad nauseum. Somtimes all the way on a long drive and sometimes through the night. They inspire me and drive me. They become the moot point of my most creative work and the reflection of my deepest emotions. And it's happening now. It's chocolate cake...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GLKvl6DzDCI

Sunday, February 21, 2010

50 Days!

It's been 50 days since I blogged. I wrote that long piece on New Year's day and then went into hibernation.

No doubt this winter has been pretty bad! Mt Laurel, which hardly gets one or 2 days of snow in a year, has had 3 blizzards and several more days of snow so far and one more storm is expected this coming week.

But these 50 days have actually been sleepless (kind of an oxymoron isn't it?). And I have been all over the place, literally. Not just travelling at a frenetic pace, but kicking and screaming, choking and struggling, barely surviving.

No one's fault I guess, all a result of my own creation. A series of events triggered by by own desire to grow, to move ahead and be different. So I guess I'm still in line with my theme for this year, to stretch and achieve more than I have ever dreamt of.

Sitting here on this sunny Sunday afternoon, after a wonderful home-cooked meal, I am trying hard to fight sleep. Nothing would be better than a nice afternoon nap to recharge my batteries.

But it's not to be. Soon I will be sitting in my car, heading to the Mt Laurel Library, to watch my son in the Lego League. I've gotta say, amidst these last 50 cold days, my son been truly been the sunshine of my life, in his every little deed.

I am no accountant for sure, but I've made it a point to count my blessings, no matter what. I started a list of little things to be thankful for and everyday something good happens to me, I've been making an entry.

I would truly love to sit here all day and write about all the wonderful things that have happened, but the car won't wait for me, nor will the library. I'm leaving now, but I will spring back. No matter what, there's no sleeping till I get what I want...

Friday, January 1, 2010

Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now...

Ever heard the song by Starship? It's nothing new but can't say it's nothing great. In fact, it's 10.17 AM on 1 Jan 2010, and I am sitting on my couch listening to this song and writing this. For I have just decided that this song will be my motto for this new year and you, dear reader, can certainly make it yours too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PP1HEFlkdY

You've got the drift and you've seen the song, now you want the story?

It was roughly the same time last night that we hit the New Jersey turnpike. My wife's sister is visiting and so is one of my dearest cousins, so we decided to spend a nice New Year's eve by watching Alvin and the Chipmunks, the Squeakuel at a nearby theatre. The show began at 730 PM and ended at 9, not as great as the orignial (part 1), but a good "time pass" movie.

As we pulled out of the parking lot a little after 9, I asked the family (in the fully packed car), if they were in a hurry to get back home, or were they up for an aimless drive? No one said no, so before they realized, I was on Route 38, headed west towards the quaint city of Philadelphia. My wife was not very convinced about the idea, I could tell from the look on her face, but I comforted her by saying that we would not get out of the car, but just drive through the streets of center city, which is how the downtown area is called, just to get the New Year feel.

I was hardly 5 mins down that road (south and west, remember) and an idea bulb went off in my head. I turned to my wife who sat next to me and softly said, "should we go in the other direction? I mean, towards the other city?" The look on her face obviously worsened but she still said ok. I wasn't sure she was and I prodded her a little further. "But you will have to fill gas", was all she said and that is all I needed. I missed the first U turn but on the second, I was heading back East and North on Route 38. Exxon on Route 73 South ensured we had a full tank and all this had taken close to an hour. Like I said, we hit the New Jersey turnpike, just about 10 PM.

My son, curious as he always is, was asking me the question, "Appa, do you even know where you are going?". "We are just going for a long ride Kanna", I insisted. He was not convinced either and my cousin and my sister-in-law had to come into play to distract him. Word building was the name of the game. The 2 in the back seat with my son are in the US for the first time and were obviously curiously excited, not knowing where we were going, but waiting to see. The lady of the house, in the front passesger seat, had to slide the backrest further back and close her eyes, in order not to show her dissent. I was moving forward.

We had entered the turnpike at exit 4 and it was raining. There was a thick fog and the prediction was that there could be ice and snow. Every often she would open her eyes and inform me about the weather, like I could not see it for myself. After about 10 miles, when we were getting close to exit 5, she could take it no more and she said, "I think we should turn back and go home". Wise woman that she was, she knew that our home was exactly in between exits 4 and 5 and that was the best chance to keep me from turning that bulb in my head OFF. "Let us just go a little longer and if it gets bad, I will turn back I promise", I said. She knew and I knew, I was not turning back.

The words continued to get built, the music continued to waft in the confused ambience inside the car and I kept the steady pace of 55 to 60 miles per hour on a 65 speed limit road. It was raining after all and all I coud see were the tail lights in front of me. "Appa, I need to use the rest room", came the call and we had to pull up into a service area. I still did not like the look on my wife's face. "Ha! Starbucks", I said. "Chai latte?", I questioned and she nodded, not thoroughly convincing. If there was one thing that could brighten her up, it was that. Alas, Starbucks was closed and we had to settle for Tetley tea and hot chocolate from Roy Rogers.

Quickly back in the car, we rode on. The words continued to flow and the skepticism was still in the air. I did everything I could to make everyone comfortable. Soon we were cruising in the rain, playing, answering phone calls and secretly I was praying (to my lord Sai Baba) that All would be well and that my secret desire would be fulfilled.

The Newark airport at exit 13 A provided for a little distraction. Everyone was searching the air to see if there were any flights landing and then to the runway to see if there were any taking off. With the amount of fog in the air, the chance of anything happening seemed remote and all they saw was the huge tractor, truck kind of vehicle ardently spraying salt on the runways and on the highway. More likelihood of snow! If you are taking the New Jersey turnpike one way or the other, I recommend you watch out to the left while going North and to the right while going South, when you are in the region between exits 13 and 14 (or 14 and 13). The sight of flights taking off and landing at the Newark airport at exit 13 A is simply breathtaking. And it can be quite an experience when you are in a moving car. But the one who is driving has to be focused.

I was chugging along. "So are you going into the city?", she asked. "Why don't we park the car at Seacaucus and take the train?" It was a good idea, no doubt, but it was not part of my plan. One of the greatest things about New York city is when you are entering it by road, just before you hit the Lincoln Tunnel, when you curve right to enter the tunnel, on the left you will see a full size view of midtown Manhattan. What can be awe-inspring in the day is simply out of the world at night, lights et al. So soon, I was past exit 15X for Seacaucus and had taken exit 16E for the Lincoln Tunnel.

The heavy fog had prevented a previously breathtaking view of the city. Just after you pass the Newark airport area, there is a kind of elevation on the road, it's not really a bridge, but more like a mound, and when you climb it and start climbing down, you get the first glimpse of the city's skyline, quite a view it is. The fog simply offered nothing to us today and at that point we had missed that. But now we were close to tunnel and as I took that right curve, I asked the first-timers to pay attention and there it was, that wonderful view of midtown.

"So we are going into the city, aren't we?", my son asked and per a previous conversation we had had, I now owed him $5, because he bet that that is where I was going and I had just brushed him aside by saying we were going for a long drive.

As we were in the tunnel, I felt the need for another pit stop and my son agreed. Though my original intention was to just drive into the city, get on the west end highway, all along the Hudson river and get out of the city through the George Washington Bridge, that was not to be. The Port Authority Bus Station and the car parking on top of it are right outside the tunnel and I pulled up into the parking lot, remember we needed the pit stop. The good part about this parking lot is that it's right on top of the bus station cum subway complex, so it has rest rooms, cafes and the works.

All of us had eased ourselves and it was time to decide what to do next. But that was only for my wife because I knew exactly what I was doing. I gave her a hug, got hold of my child's arm and asked him to wear his gloves. There was only one way we were going. Out. We stepped out on to 8th avenue and it was 1140 PM. The mighty New York times building was right in front of us and as we tried to find its vertical end, we only found ourselves staring into the fog. But that was not the important thing now. Here we were 2 blocks away from Times Square, 20 minutes from midnight, when the legendary ball dropping would take place to announce the New Year.

"Let's just go to that Starbucks, get that chai latte and get back to the car", I sugggested, fully knowing that is not what I meant. So we moved towards 42nd street and realized that at the corner of 42nd and 8th, there was no moving forward. All we could see was a sea of humans. The police had cordoned off the streets and the sidewalks were overflowing. However, we noticed that everyone was looking in the direction of 7th and 43rd and we could see a building with a clock tower with a ball on top of it. "Is that the ball", people were asking. "No, I don't think so", someone else was saying. There was no way we were getting to Starbucks so I suggested that we get back to the car.

"No, let's just wait and see what happens", my wife said and that bulb in my brain started glowing like a thousand watts. No sooner had she said that (it was closer to 1155) and suddenly the floodgates were opened and the police allowed the people from the sidelwalk to step on the street. It was raining and I had my son on my shoulder, so I asked my family not to step out onto the street, but before I had realized, my wife, cathcing hold of her sister's hand, had surged forward and brought herself to a spot, from where we could see the REAL BALL! Did I have an option? My son, my cousin and I were there in less than a minute too.

All we heard was noise. And then it happened. The ball started falling slowly and the fireworks emerged. Streaks of color filled the sky and the glitzy signs in the Times Square area added to the fervor. The noise increased. And the countdown began, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, ZERO. And the crowd went wild. HAPPY NEW YEAR! My wife was smiling and my son was loving it. As for my 2 guests who were visiting New York for the first time, you probably have to email them or check them out on Facebook, to see what they felt.

To me, this night was not about watching the ever famous ball dropping at New York's Times Square. It was about stretching my limits. On another day, I would have never undertaken this journey. Rain, fog and expectation of ice and snow were a perfect recipe to stay home, watch a movie and go to bed. And I would have been thoroughly satisfied with that. Last night, there was a desire, to ask for more from life and stretch myself a little harder to get it. Honestly, all I wanted was to show my guests, my dear sister-in-law and my dear cousin, the 2 breathtaking views of New York city that I have never ceased to be amazed with how many ever times I have seen them. I just wanted to make them feel excited about this New Year eve. When my wife wanted to turn back at exit 5, I decided I was sticking to the course and I guess I hit the jackpot.

And hence the theme and title of this story. Last night made me believe, that nothing is going to stop me this year and I am going to stretch myself to get what I want in life. And I wanted to share this with one and all, family and friends, just to let you know, Nothing's going to stop you now.

WISHING YOU, DEAR READER, A LIMITLESS NEW YEAR. GO GET WHAT YOU WANT.

Our wonderful journey ended at 245 AM, only after my wife got an extra hot cup of Chai latte from Casa Java and we witnessed a medium size aircraft touchdown at the Newark airport, literally metres away from eyesight...